Leppy recently returned from Las Vegas. Along with the bag of cocaine and hooker named Mercedes, she brought me back a miniature of the Las Vegas sign. It lights up all colorful and plays Viva Las Vegas and slot machine noises. Basically, it's the most amazing thing I have ever seen. As excited as I am about it, I think Leppy is a bitch. Now when I go to Ireland I have to get her something equally as mind-blowingly awesome. She has set me up for failure, unless I actually bring her home an Irish man. I think I have the...skills...to accomplish this.
The bar has been set, I will not fail.