Tuesday, April 13, 2010

The Great Jean Debacle

Yesterday, I dragged my ass to the mall to change my money into Euros and get a pair of jeans. Have you ever been over customer serviced? I have, and it happened less than twenty-four hours ago. Three girls greeted Leppy and I as we went into the store we were too old to shop in.
I had a couple pair of jeans selected when a young woman, wearing scarves and tight leggings, came over. Here is what ensued:
"Want me to start a fitting room for you?"
"Uhh...ok," I said.
"I see you got the boyfriend jeans here. Do you like the boyfriend fit? We have these other pants that are slouchy skinny, they are super cute and they combined the boyfriend with the skinny."
A moment of silence. "I have no idea what that means."
"Oh, you see these are a baggier fit. How about I grab them for you and you can try them on?"

Once in the changing room the woman brought me six pairs of jeans. I had two selected and I ended up trying on eight million pairs. I bought the one pair I'd selected. I don't like shopping. I hate trying on clothes. And it was the first time I'd been over customer serviced.

What I learned?

I am too old to shop in the young people stores. I have no idea what slouchy-skinny means. Boyfriend jeans are jeans that look like they could be your boyfriends. And I have turned into a crotchty bitch who just wants to be left alone while shoving her ass into a pair of jeans.


C-Stene said...

"TOTALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLY cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuTE!!!"

I'd like to add to this.
While wating for Tina to try on her jeans, I had been approached about 75 times by the sales girls.

"Soooo...your friend is trying something on? Why aren't you?"

"Still browsing?"

"You know, we have ribbed tank tops on sale 2 for 16 bucks. They go really nice under shirts and stuff..."

And it didn't end.
It also made me extremely uncomfortable.
Does it look like I want to discuss the difference between a boyfriend jean and a skinny jean with you? Or the fact that the geniuses at The Garage managed to morph the two together to create the Skinny Slouchy jean? Shut up.
I'm sure that you were born the year I graduated. I'm an old lady. I shop at Old Navy. Leave me alone.

You know what else I don't understand? We were exactly responding to their greetings. Wouldn't that be the first sign that we want to be left alone? But they kept at it.
You could tell that they had been trained to harass their customers and that the store manager was working that day.
When I worked in a clothing store, I greeted the customer once. If they wanted to talk to me, they;d approach me themselves.
So, in closing, You can shove your Slouchy skinny jeans up your ass, you stupid turd.

R.C. Lewis said...

Shopping (especially clothes shopping) = evil. This is an extension of the fact that clothing designers are evil warped-body-shape Nazis who have no concept of the many shapes and sizes real women come in, but that's a rant for another time. ;-)

There are a few stores that don't make me want to scream the moment I walk in. Those are stores where they pretty much only talk to you once you're ready to check out. And you can come and go from the fitting rooms as you please without anyone bugging you.