Friday, April 3, 2009

Shorty Got Low...Sort Of

Hey Flow Rida,
What's up?
Just wanted to let you know that it isn't feasible for all shawtys to get low. It just so happens that when you are a lady of a certain girth, and unreasonable inner ear balance, getting all low up on the floor just isn't going to happen. Thanks to you there is a whole song that requires us shawtys to get low and when we don't everyone knows because we're the only ones left standing.

Here it is... If I do attempt to get low there are a few things that may happen (are you willing to take responsibility for them?)

1. I may fall over, once I get down a certain way my balance is compromised and splaying spread eagle on the floor is a huge possibility.
2. I might not be able to get back up and may require assistance, either by bar table or sturdy man's leg.
3. I may either show crack (which in all likelihood is pretty much certain) or my pants will split, this is because when you bend over to get low it puts tension on the material and hightens the chances of the world seeing my full bum montrosities.

I would like to request you change the lyrics to your song to make them able for everyone to participate are some recommendations...

"Shawty had decent priced jeans, boots with fake fur
The whole club wasn't lookin at her.
She got dragged onto the flo, onto the flo
Next thing you know, Shawty attempted to get low low low"

It's just a suggestion.

1 comment:

Monsieur Muckety Muck Muck said...

This might be your funniest post yet.