Thursday, April 16, 2009

The Horse Whisperer

No I don't talk to horses.
But my voice is all horse and all I can do is whisper.
I sound like a cross between Tom Waits, Jennifer Tilly and a 13 year old boy going through puberty.
Yesterday when we were in the car driving home Leps told me that she likes my new voice because it's like she has a new friend.
It's kind of nice to have a raspy sexy voice and not having to smoke seventy packs of ciggarettes a day to get it.
What isn't nice?
Coughing, blowing my nose and thinking 'is that supposed to be that color'.
I'm thinking avout starting my own phone sex line. Call it Tit For Tat and people will get turned on by phlemgh heaven. Maybe not.
This morning when I tried to talk for the first time nothing came out.
For a moment I was like what if I could never talk again what would my last words have been.
I think it would have been..."Leave me alone"...really words to make history by.
So if you want to get some jolly's give me a call at 888-TalkBad.


C-Stene said...

Kathleen Turner.

Monsieur Muckety Muck Muck said...

Don't forget Laura Pepron, Demi Moore, and Kirsti Alley and they were all hot at some point.

I must admit, I will miss your new voice, all though after you mentioned the phlegm part maybe not.