Time Waster Extraordinaire

So, I'm pretty good at wasting time. It isn't something I like to brag about because, in a world where everyone is claiming to multitask and have so much to do, it kind of makes me look lazy. The funny part is, most of us aren't as busy as we claim to be. We always puzzle out ways to sneak in the things we love, be it watching movies, knitting, writing, hiking, swimming, or simply drinking hooch and listening to sad music.

The thing is, we like wasting time. Sure, we might feel bad about it later, but for the most part, life seems to be about wasting time. In fact, wasting time is sort of subjective. It's not like the majority of us are trying to figure out a cure for Cancer or working towards equal rights for everyone everywhere, even though most of us want those things. (Except the jerks, of course. They don't want any good things to happen.)

Because I've been wasting time for so long, or enjoying life as I like to call it, I have become an extraordinary time waster. If you have a copious amount of time on your hands and need to get through a couple hours, I have one website to occupy you for all eternity. Unlike YouTube and IMDB (two sites I occasionally get lost in a vortex of information), this new site will not only amuse but inform you, and for some strange reason, I don't know anyone who uses it, except me.

Don't think I discovered this treasure, though. It's super popular, just not with West Coast Canadians, apparently.

Welcome to ODDEE! 

Think of Oddee as an odd little gathering place for weirdos who like to make lists. That's right, lists. This site is filled to the brim with lists of strange things, like 20 Creeptastic Horror Movie Tattoos and 12 Amazing Real People Who Look Like Cartoons. It has lists for the celebrity enthusiast (10 Most Extreme Method Actors), world traveller (15 Breathtaking Views From Amazing Rooms), nature lover (10 Geological Wonders You Don't Know) and even the science minded (9 Bizarre Pieces of Medical Advice That Actually Work). 

Honestly, there's something for everyone. If you're out to learn or simply be entertained, this is the website for you. 

You're welcome, in advance. 

Exquisite Moments Of Utter Stupidity

I will write a book with this title. 

These are the types of notes I have in my 'ideas' folder. 

It's kind of embarrassing. 

But I can't delete them. 

There is a beginning of a poem that starts and when the moon is my companion. 

And I am no poet. Trust me. 

Another single line entry reads: Love, the ultimate goal, achieved only through heartbreak and walking a line towards a goal you often doubt exists.

Not sure what I was going for with that. Some sort of self help book? Oh, how hilarious. 

And there this paragraph that makes me laugh - Like some sort of post graduation cliché, except I was twenty-two, not nineteen, I found myself employed at a coffee shop called Bitches Brew. Only snarky females need apply. Also, I lived in a dive apartment with two other girls I barely knew. Gretchen, a wannabe folk singer, who wore toques all year round, and Polly, a waif-thin girl who aspired to be the next screenplay writer of modern chick things and who took up smoking to better suit the persona. Highly allergic to cigarette smoke and folk music, I didn’t exactly enjoy my room-mates. But they were better than my last ones—my parents.  

Perhaps I was going to write the next best disenchanted youth novel, or guide to falling in and out of love.

 

Is it just me who has this unreasonable attachment to every silly little bit and bobble of story I create? 

The folder is ever-expanding. 

First lines, paragraphs, dreams, novels with twenty thousand words that I never finished. I am overflowing with these files, which would be scraps of paper if this was fifty years ago.

Now I kind of wish they were scraps of paper. 

It's easier to forget about random files buried in my dropbox in a top secret folder. 

Harder to hide a book. 

If I had one, I'd keep it by my bed and add ideas to it every night.  

But that might only add to my abundant idea problem.