Alright, the first part was serious. The last part was my attempt at a joke.
Growing up, I always had a clear picture of what sexy was. And it certainly wasn't anything I could ever encapsulate. When I thought about sexy it conjured up images of smokey eyes, high heels, wild hair and lingerie. Even now, I think of long legs, smooth skin and naughty librarians. Not too sure why on the last one, it just pops into my head when I think about sexiness. Probably because it's one of the ultimate male fantasies - right alongside innocent schoolgirl.
Here's what's weird, when I think of the word sexy, I think of women.
The reason for this is, women are supposed to be sexy. Isn't that so?
Ever since I was little, I grew up thinking I was supposed to be this hairless, skinny, rosy cheeked, perfectly quaffed, vixen with big boobs. Well, only one of those things is true - and it certainly isn't the hairless, skinny, rosy cheeked, perfectly quaffed vixen part. I even remember taking my sister's razor and shaving my entire body in order to get rid of the peach fuzz covering my skin.
At eight years old, why did I think any form of body hair was wrong?
Honestly, I don't know. It's too easy to blame the media. Isn't it? And yet, that's where I want to go. All of these images we are faced with make us think high heels, lingerie, push-up bras, tanned skin, make-up and flawless hair is the epitome of sexy. But these are things I'm never going to buy into.
The truth of the matter is, I will never be this:
Here's the facts: I will never represent what socity thinks sexy is.
But then, I got to thinking. Do I think these things are sexy?
In truth, no.
Don't get me wrong, it works on some women. The women who exude femininity and softness. They ooze sex appeal and are comfortable slinking around in a shimmery dress and six inch heels. I am not one of those ladies. And, while there was a time when I wanted to be one of these women, I realize it simply isn't me. I don't have the time and/or patience to be one of these girls.
After I stopped thinking about myself, and how unsexy I truly am in my jeans, t-shirts and Converse sneakers, I started thinking about men. Nearly everyday on my Facebook, random pictures of half-clad men pop up in my feed. These are treats from other women. It's this whole eye-candy thing. To be fair, they post pictures of women too, but it's always the men that catch my eye because... Well, because I like men. Not saying I don't like to look at women, I do, but I'd rather ogle men. They say the female figure is more aesthetically pleasing. I actually disagree with this.
Regardless, they always end up posting pictures like this:
Here's the thing, I just don't get it. I know we all have it in us to appreciate a nice body, but sometimes when I look at models (men and women) I think, this isn't real. And it isn't real. It isn't natural. Not in my opinion. And then I got it. Then I realized what it is that I find truly sexy.
Natural. And a nice pair of arms. But mostly, someone who is natural. Men and women. Someone who simply exists and doesn't fuss and primp and worry about their looks. And it goes for everything. I enjoy a natural smell, look, and feel on people. For me, the idea of a man in jeans and a t-shirt out in the garden pulling weeds is far sexier than a greased up man riding a horse topless in chaps.
And you know what? True sexiness extends beyond the physical.
Oh, don't get me wrong. It helps to have a rockin' rack and legs that just won't quit, but they will only get you so far. Well, at least when it comes to me, it will only get you so far.
To me, sexy is reading. Being out in nature. Animal lovers. Compassion. Creativity. Respect. Intelligence. Common sense. Embracing emotions. A dose of cynicism. Having hope. And faith. Trust. A sense of romance. Desire.
It isn't a six pack or an ass you can bounce a quarter off of.
Sexy is walking through the grass barefoot. Taking long drives along the coast. Music nerdiness. Entertaining a possible future. Messy hair. A complete lack of worry and doubt and fear. Confidence without being big-headed. Lack of ego. Happiness. Lightness. Being realistic. And above everything humour. The ability to laugh at the world and yourself.
Sexy is knowing who you are and refusing to compromise it.
It's loving yourself. And those around you. Now that's hot.