Based On A True Story - Day 30

No matter what, when I see the words 'based on a true story' at the beginning of a horror movie, my skin crawls a bit. As was the case with last night's Horrorfest pick.

Title: The Conjuring
Year: 2013
Synopsis: Paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren work to help a family terrorized by a dark presence in their farmhouse.

Tagline: Look what you made me do.

If the names Lorraine and Ed Warren ring bells to you, it's probably because you know the tale of the Amityville Horror. Another spooky movie based on actual events, how loosely, I can't be sure. These experienced paranormal demonologists have apparently investigated over ten thousand cases, that's a lot of scares. Furthermore, these people keep objects from their cases in a museum, in their house. This is not something I would encourage, then again, I'm saner than I first appear.

Unlike a lot of other people, I am not a huge fan of director James Wan. I thought Saw was okay, but relied on shock value to entertain, and Insidious was boring and cliched. Thankfully, I don't boycott movies based on director alone. Actually, I was quite looking forward to The Conjuring because out of the four main characters, I disliked none of the actors portraying them. Okay, you might roll your eyes at that, thinking it isn't a good enough reason to get excited over a film, but do you know how hard it is to find an awesome  ensemble cast where you don't hate any of the leads? Virtually impossible.

If you are a seasoned horror watcher, you've seen the tricks within before. Doors move on their own. People are animated without their control. Objects appear out of nowhere. Pictures fall off walls. And when you are looking over here at this cute little family, something is going to appear on the other side of the room. Or jump off a wardrobe. Oh, and anyone who has seen any exorcism in any form, either on YouTube or in a movie, then you have seen at least a piece of the Conjuring pie. That said, it is because these things work to scare that they are used over-and-over again. I will openly admit that I actually screamed out loud during one part. For serious. I was knee deep in the movie, riveted to the screen, unable to look away, and then the door moved and I let loose a scream any thirteen year old girl would be mortified by.

What I liked about this, is that it took two Warren cases and made them come together. I also enjoyed the gaggle of girls who are part of the Perron family brood. A lot of these horror movies are reliant on the acting skills of young children. A lot of the time, it misses, but all of the girls in this movie were good actresses, and I blame the girl who got pulled across her bed for roping me into the movie so far that I got vocal.

Here's the thing. If I bought a house and there is a boarded up cellar, which happens to be where the furnace is, you can bet your ass I would be asking, "Why is this cellar boarded up?" Sure, this family asks it, but they don't delve in and try to figure out why someone would cover it up. Granted, they didn't have a lot of time, their visitors come out to play pretty quickly. Which is just another thing to like. The lack of time wasting. I find in so many new horror movies they meander all over the place before getting to the good stuff, or they unload too much too soon. The Conjuring is right smack dab in the middle of that. It brings on the scares quickly, but it doesn't reveal too much.

By the time I was halfway through I'd already made up my mind. I liked it. And that lasted straight through to the end.

I would never keep this creepy doll anywhere near my home.

6734

One might think to themselves, what a strange blog title. A number. Six thousand seven hundred and thirty-four. 

What could this possibly mean? asks my adorning fan. 

Is this a code? Does it need to be broken? Surely there must be some deep meaning within this number to unlock the untold wonders of the world and deliver unto the masses the truth of life and why we are all here. 

Alas, it isn't so grand. This number will not change your life. It won't make you richer, prettier or more intelligent. No one will write a book or movie about this number. Actually, with all this hype, it's kind of boring what this number is. Unfortunately, I've already come this far, so I kind of have to continue. 

This is the number of reads I've had on my most popular post on this here blog. 

Crazy, right? 

And you won't even guess what the subject matter is of my most popular posting either. 

The Exorcist. 

No, really. I'm not pulling your leg or making a joke. It truly is. 

This strikes me as hilarious. I mean, I have poured my heart and soul into some of the articles here. I've talked about love, my insecurities, detailed my journey through the jungle of life, and still, the most popular post on my blog is about exorcisms.  

This is a lesson learned, my fair writers, bloggers and creative creatures. If all you want is hits and numbers and stats, just post about the Exorcist. The mob will come flocking. Still, I find myself sitting up at night pondering this fascinating factoid. What is it about The Exorcist that people feel compelled to Google fifty times a day? 

Let's break this down and get all up in the numbers and stuff. I posted E Is For Exorcism  on October 6th. It is now April 15. This is about six months. If we do the math, which I've always hated doing, this breaks down to around 1122 hits a month. Given there is about thirty days in a month, this works out to being 37 hits a day. All for exorcisms and the wonderment of demons invading bodies!  

It leads me to believe there are a lot more possessions taking place on a daily basis than any of us could ever imagine. This is both frightening and fabulous. See, it's terrifying because none of us want to see anyone's head spin around or have them impale their naughty bits on a cross, a la Regan in The Exorcist  The sheer thought of a demon sneaking into your body and holding court is more than a little unnerving. But isn't it fabulous to know you live in a world where these are the things people are concerning themselves with. 

Even more interesting, a lot of these hits are coming from Singapore and the Philippines. Which only confirms that I most likely won't be planning a vacation to these destinations any time soon. Well, not without a bucket of holy water and a silver cross. 

Okay, so I just took the time to do the actual math. It's been 192 days since I hit the publish button for this, which works out to 35 hits a day. Of course, for all I know there was a group possession on a holiday weekend and three thousand of the original six thousand seven hundred and thirty-four were accumulated then. It worries me that people were in search of help to expel the demon from their loved ones and instead of finding do-it-yourself step-by-step possession instructions they found my cheeky blog instead.

This informative post has been brought to you by my over-thinking and general absurdness. 

A Little Yoga Never Hurt Anyone

X Is For Xenoglossia

Uh, xenoglossia? What now?

Xenoglossia, or Xenoglossy, is the ability claimed by mediums and clairvoyants that allows them to speak, and write, languages they are unfamiliar with. It can happen when they channel spirits and otherworldly beings.

This, of course, isn't the most scientific or popular explanation of the word, just the one that ties in nicely with my October themed blog challenge. What? Don't give me that look. I fully intend to share with you what most people consider Xenoglossia to be.

Basically, from what I understand, most who experience this marvel aren't doing it while in a trance or religion-related act, but while in a 'normal' state of mind, performing every day activities. The people who have done studies on these happenings have found that there is often a manifestation of secondary personalities and the 'normal' personality is often unaware of their secondary one. In these cases, the other language is most often fragmented and limited, with only very few being native-like and highly developed. While the first instance can be reasoned away by learning bits and bobs of language through television programs or books or a neighbour who speaks in another tongue, the latter is a bit harder to explain.

And then there is the paranormal explanation. Some people believe xenoglossia is an indicator of reincarnation, as well. But how can one even prove this? You either believe in it, or you don't. Kind of like demons and the devil.

Yup, that's right. Possession.

So, it's Friday night and you're standing around your sister who just happens to be possessed and you decided it's time to get a priest in and expel the evil spirit. Nothing like a possession to kick start your weekend. There you are, priest on you left, praying mother on your right, and sister with a spinning head in the middle of the bed. All of a sudden, she starts talking. At first you're like, "Hey, Sis, speak up, I have no idea what your saying." But then you realize, it isn't English.

It's Latin. And it's creeping you out.

Well, that's xenoglossia too. It's the sudden acquisition of a language not previously spoken. In a lot of reported cases, the person who is experiencing this unique phenomenon is speaking a dead language.  And by a lot of reported cases, I mean, in a lot of movies. While people do become possessed and exorcisms have been done in the real world, I'm drawing most of my information from films, mostly the Exorcist.

That said, my mom insists my dad speaks another language in his sleep.

Something similar to this strange occurrence is called glossolalia, which is known as speaking in tongues. This is often seen at religious services. When people are being saved and having fits and babbling incoherently. If you don't know what I'm talking about, look up a documentary called Jesus Camp. It's one of the most terrifying films I've ever seen in my entire life. And it's real.

Okay, now that we know what Xenoglossia is, let's explore whether it is real.

Well, as a matter of fact, a lot of people say 'no'. In almost all cases of xenoglossia, the dead or unknown language turns out to be no language. Meaning, it's all made up. Sure, it sounds all spooky and crazy, with convincing cadence and intonations, but it's just gibberish. That doesn't mean the possessed or medium or clairvoyant is faking it. A lot fo people think of this phenomenon as psychological and not linguistic. People who have undergone brain studies while experiencing this strange happening have shown to be using the emotion parts of their brains, rather than the speech sections.

So, there you have it. Xenoglossia. Fun for the whole family.

Now, a snippet from Stigmata.