It's Too Much For Me

The last couple weeks I've been growing increasingly disenchanted with the things I'm seeing in my social media feeds. If it isn't a post about how police officers are mistreating the very individuals they are sworn to protect, then it's an article detailing how easy it is for kids to get their hands on guns and kill each other. There is a never ending succession of stories to prove homophobia is thriving, that babies are dying, and politicians are lying. Hate crimes are being committed. The poor are being mistreated. And animals are suffering abuse at the hands of sociopaths.

There are so many bad things.

Today I read a story about how children at a daycare were accidentally given water with bleach in it to drink. An article proving that 'rape culture' is alive and well, if not thriving in this day and age. A horrifying account of the medical system in America and how much it cost one woman to give birth by C-section ($42,000). The disturbing tweets from a teacher who talks about killing her students and how much she hates them, talk about professionalism. How the ebola virus is moving faster than the capacity to manage it. That Paris Hilton bought a dog for thirteen thousand dollars (like really?). How a suicide bomber kills 16 in Somalia. The Syrian Civil War is raging. That Iraq is under siege (again? Or still?). About the Antarctic shelf collapsing. And how Nestle thinks water shouldn't be free.

There was more too. A lot more. So many horrible things happening. And everyone is sharing it. Yes, it's good to be informed and to understand the situation all of us are in.

But honestly, it's just too much for me.

I need a little kindness.

Lately, I've been sitting here wondering if there is anything nice out there. Can anyone remain positive in the face of so much disaster? If what Bill Hicks says is true and this is all a ride, it's the most terrifying one I've ever been on. No one is learning their lesson. The wheels are coming off the cart. There are definitely no safety belts. Who the hell is controlling this thing? It certainly isn't me. And that's what's scary. We aren't in control. No, not you. Nor I.

For the most part, we are good people. So why is there so much misery? How can this place feel like such a soul draining black hole? If we genuinely care about one another, then how is everything going to hell in a hand-basket? It hurts my head to think about. It hurts my heart to keep existing in such bleakness. And yet, we keep going. We plough our fields. Tend our flock. Try to eat healthy. Exercise. Pay the bills.

And in silence, we hope it will get better.  But we keep sharing the misery and grief. Can we at least have just one day where all we share with each other is love and kindness and good positive energy? Is that too much to ask? Probably.